If you go hunting on YouTube, you can find all sorts of ways to waste days of your life on things so pointless it’s untrue. One such are the ‘8 hours of…’ videos. ‘8 hours of Anime Characters saying “baka!” (I have no idea if that video exists, but it should). ‘8 hours of a relaxing fireplace’ (Likely doesn’t exist with that name, but you can bet there are several where that’s all you get). There are several that play one song, over and over, for people who can’t be bothered to put something on continuous loop.
Now, the British Broadcasting Corporation, that august institution that brought you Downton Abbey and Doctor Who, brings you ‘9 hours of our Christmas cat hoovering #XmasLife.’ It’s a classic. Yes, you can watch a fixed camera scene of a Christmas tree with presents around it, and a long-haired cat on a Roomba sliding from left to right in the foreground. Then it does a right to left sweep. Then… You get the picture. Now I know where my licence fee was spent.
I admit that I haven’t watched all nine hours. Something insane might happen at hour five. Maybe the cat sneezes. Or gets off and chases the Roomba for a few seconds. Or it falls asleep, falls off, and then pretends it didn’t really do that. Or its tail gets sucked into the hoover! We just don’t know! If anyone does watch it all the way through, don’t spoil the ending for the rest of us!
Witches and Ray-Guns 