Okay, it’s out.
Category Archives: News
Celestia Help Me! I’m a Brony
Weird things happen when you watch YouTube’s recommended videos. And I blame Weird Al. Back when I used to play World of Warcraft I found this WoW video animation of his ‘Hardware Store’ song. (If you’re unaware of this ditty, go look it up on YouTube: it’s worth it just for the verbal gymnastics.) Recently, for whatever reason, the YouTube algorithm threw me a different Hardware Store animation, built out of clips for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Now, I’m old enough to remember when the MLP franchise started and it was very girly, but the clips made it look amusing and buck it if Netflix don’t have the first five seasons on stream…
So, I ended up binge-watching six seasons of MLP:FIM (I found the sixth to stream on Amazon), and four Equestria Girls films, and I’ve been smirking at the fandom-produced stuff on YouTube, DeviantArt, and a fanfic site… I’d hang my head in shame, but bronies are supposed to stand up proud. Whatever, I’m hooked. For a while anyway.
Now, the reason for this admission is that all this uplifting pony stuff percolating through my somewhat aberrant brain provoked an idea. The idea became a plot. The plot has become a book. I think I posted something saying I had a weird idea and I wasn’t sure it would work. Well, this is it and it’ll be out sometime next week. For those worried I’ve gone totally off the rails, there will be no ponies (in fact, the world in question doesn’t have any equines due to divergent evolution), but it does have dragons. A lot of dragons, though they aren’t exactly big scaled lizards most of the time… I should just let you read about it.
The new book is called Misfit Magic. It’s fantasy, obviously, set in a world with a weird mix of technologies and a fair bit of magic. It’s more traditional fantasy than urban fantasy, and I have no idea what categories I’m going to stuff it into for retail purposes, but Teen Fiction will not be one of them. And I have a cover which is quite bright for once…
Oh, yeah, and it’s set in a girls’ school for magic. Oh… I have to write cover blurb for this… What was I thinking?!
Anyway, I’m looking at releasing this on the 5th or 6th of May, depending upon when I can get through the final edits, and when I can come up with a reasonable cover blurb. And I repeat: no ponies.
Posted in Digital Art, Misfits, News, Opinion
Tagged Brony, dragon, ebook, fandom, fantasy, MLP, my little pony, release date
The Zanari Inheritance
The new book is out. The Zanari Inheritance is available on Smashwords now and Amazon soon. Apple iBooks, B&N, etc will follow when they’ve done their vetting thing.
Sorry to have been a bit silent about this one coming, but the last few weeks have been… interesting, and busy. I’ll post some more about this book and series in the near future, but in the meantime, I hope you enjoy it.
Progress, or the Lack Thereof
Okay, I’ve finally had to admit to myself that I’m totally blocked on the Thaumatology book. With my house a building site and my concentration shot, I shouldn’t be expecting miracles, but I’m grinding in ever decreasing circles here and it’s time I stepped back and came at this from another angle at a later date. Basically, I’m delaying that book and trying something else to get myself back in the right frame of mind. Apologies to those hanging there waiting for more Ceri and Lily. I am, however, planning to do a full reissue of the Thaumatology series with the typos taken out and new covers, plus (assuming I can manage it) an omnibus collection which won’t be much use to most of you guys, but may bring in some new people who’ll press me for more.
So, I’ve started working on something else which I’m not going to say much about right now. I’m trying to put it out in the slot I was going to use for the Thaumatology book, likely in March. All I will give you is the render below. Make of that what you will.
Posted in Digital Art, News, Thaumatology, Writing
Tagged bad news, characters, science fiction
Paperback Writer
There is a new feature on the Amazon KDP system which is, apparently designed to promote their print-on-demand service. As some of you may know, I’ve played with PoD before and I came to the conclusion that, while it’s cool to have a print copy of a book I wrote, the sales aren’t really sufficient to justify the cost of formatting the document for print. It seems that Amazon are attempting to reduce the cost by using the same source file to produce the print copy, but I would need to produce appropriate artwork: the ebook cover would need to be enhanced, basically.
Now, I may try playing with this anyway, just to see what comes out of their new system, but I wanted to do a straw poll and see what people think. Is there an interest in physical copies of my books? Print tends to be more expensive, but it’s all Amazon so if you buy one from them you’d get a discount on the other format.
Your thoughts would be appreciated.
Letters to Santa
Okay, folks, this is… Hmm. Well, I was digging around in my files this evening (damn, it’s almost 11pm) and I found something which I think was supposed to be longer and never got finished. I’m fairly sure it was supposed to be longer and a lot sadder, and maybe one day it will be, but for now there’s about a page of it and I thought I’d share it. It is that time of year…
Uh, also, I updated the What I’m Up To page today. I’m working on getting the next Thaumatology book going, hence me finding this. Here we go. All spelling errors are intended. Hope you’re as amused as I was when I found it.
A Letter to Santa
By Lilith Carpenter, aged 7¾
Dear Santa,
I know I am a half-sucky-bus, but I think I should be allowed to write a letter to you, even if Miriam Wooster says I cant, but everyone says how she smells so I think I can because she smells. So I am writing you this letter so that you will no what I want fro Chissmas.
Mummy says that you only bring presents to good little girls. I am a good little girl even if I am a half-sucklybus. I help my Mummy with the dishes. I dry dishes real good and I have not broken one this month. I have not pulled Miriam Wooster’s hair for a week even if she smells and calls me a big fat demon. I am not a demon. I am a half-sucsybus.
Okay what I would like for Chissmas is a Daddy. I would like a Daddy because all the other children have one, even if they do not all live with them. I dont have a Daddy at all. Well I do but he is in demonland with the other demons and I cant even visit him or call him on the telyphone. I would like a Daddy so I can be like everone else. But most of all I would like a Daddy because my Mummy needs him to. I see her looking sad sometimes and I know having a Daddy to be with would make her happy and I want Mummy to be happy so I would like a Daddy.
And a pony.
Thank you Santa.
Love, Lilith.
~~~
By Lilith Carpenter, aged 8¾
Dear Santa,
Thank you for sending me my Daddy. He is a great Daddy and tells me the best bedtime stories.
My spelling has got a lot better in the last year. I am amazed you could read last year’s letter. I suppose you have a lot of practice reading bad writing.
I have been a really good girl this year. Daddy says I will grow up to be a good little succubus, just like Tef. Mummy says I have to stay a good little girl, otherwise I will be a right little madam. I hope I can be a good little succubus and a good little girl.
Thank you for sending my Daddy.
Please could I have the pony now.
Love, Lilith.
~~~
By Ceridwyn Brent, aged 9
Dear Santa,
Look, I realise you’re a mythical, pseudo-religious character created to Christianise a pagan myth-figure, but our teacher says we have to write a “Letter to Santa” to put up on the pin-board, so here is mine. Don’t get me wrong, I love presents just as much as the next kid, but I know you don’t come down the chimney to deliver them. For one thing, Dad told me years ago you were fictional, and even if my parents wanted to be a bit secretive about putting the presents out, I spotted them sneaking down from the attic last year.
Okay, now we have that out of the way, I guess I should give you the list. I’d like:
A My First Alchemy Set.
A thaumometer of my own. Dad has loads, but I’d like one. A proper one, not a kid’s one.
A copy of the Junior Thaumatologist’s Encyclopaedia.
Oh, and a pet dragon.
Thanks, Ceri.
Status Update
Aka: The Sanity Report.
Sanity Status: Mild hallucination with some delusions of normality.
I am, to some extent, in my new home. I have internet and all my computers are attached to it now (via a 20m CAT5 cable in one case). I’m about in a position to do some more writing, intermixed with continued unpacking of boxes.
I still aim to have Gunwitch: Rebirth out before Christmas. After that… I think I’m going to do the next Thaumatology book. I know, it’s been said before. I’m going to have a good, hard try at it because I think I’m in the mood. Update on whether that’s working once the Gunwitch book is out.
Be My Valentine
Well, not mine, I wouldn’t presume, but Dione’s open to offers.
Valentines Day Officially Moved to October!
Okay, not really.
This is an update on my current entropy level, i.e. how much chaos do I have in my system. Current entropy level is: Imminent universal heat death.
Anyway, Be My Valentine will be officially released on Sunday, that’s the 30th. That’s good: vampires just before Halloween. I’m currently working through the edits and I don’t have cover art yet (such is the state of my life). If I can get everything organised sometime tomorrow, then I’ll put the book up early, but I’m only going to promise it’ll be up before midnight on Sunday. As soon as it’s live, I’ll let you all know.
My house move is progressing to the point where I know I’m going to be largely without internet from November 5th to 11th. If anyone’s trying to contact me during that period… Well, I probably won’t know about it. At least I won’t have any distractions to stop me doing moving stuff. However, expect me to be mildly insane on the 12th.
